Hello LGPSN! A few weeks ago I promised a big ass article and as promised, here it is. (I hate introductions so this is short and to the point, just how I like it) This article is going to be broken up in 3 separate portions. The first is where I just shit on bad trades and the joke teams in the league. The second is something new that I’m not sure if people will like or not: Basically, I’m going to do a what if the playoffs started next week? A breakdown of all of the matchups, who I think would win said matchup, and my best guess at the game 7 line. The last portion will be my highly coveted update on my worst contracts: Who shouldn’t have made the list, who should have, and a reranking of my top 10. Let’s get it. Jokes First, I’d like to start with one of the funniest… Anaheim is first in the entire league and Philly is dead last in the East and 4th from last in the league. Why is this funny you ask? Because prior to the start of the season, @xCounter43x could be seen slapping his dick in people’s faces saying he was the sole reason why Anaheim(previously NYI) won the Stanley cup last season. And everybody agreed with him, including myself. Now, I’m far from a @BigFreeze064 fan but this is fucking hilarious. I wonder which manager is really better? Hmmm The Dallas Stars have 15 players on their roster and they’ve made 3 trades so far this season where they moved 2 guys for 1. I don’t claim to be an expert on ownership but having 17 capable NHLers is pretty important, no? Don’t get me wrong, quality is certainly more important than quantity but their top line center is @Kroftonite , owner @vKB-_- -_- is on a 2nd line with very little reputable talent, and the 3rd line is just an AHL/ECU sui line, ouch. I’m not going to go into any specific trades but they’re all bad. @HazeeHype is short and bad at the game. @vShot94 is having another bad season. Honestly, this clown should just give up. Bad player and a bad owner is just a bad combination. I heard @ITIoMMy- the owner of the LA Kings left his discord after winning a game because he only had 2 points. Sounds like a lot of puberty toxicity over there. Let’s hope @Hra-ow’s sister doesn’t steal his PS4 midgame to watch netflix again *INSERT WINKY FACE HERE JOE* If so I could see the Los Angeles squeakers falling underneath the pressure of their newly dropped balls. @jay6219 ’s ownership resume. The Boston Bruins’ elite Xbox squad. LOL Last but not least, @Gourr- got absolutely PYLON’d during his game against the Dallas stars. https://www.twitch.tv/crofto_40/clip/TastyConcernedSandpiperItsBoshyTime His response? “1st time ive been like coned coned in LG” Way to stay humble my guy. Let me know if you liked this segment or not. I didn’t really enjoy doing it, it was too easy, lazy, and just felt forced in a way. If enough people like it, I’ll continue with one after my trade deadline worst trades article. Did he just say worst trades article? If The Playoffs Started Next Week Well, EA just announced they’re bankrupt(honestly not a wildly inconceivable scenario) and they’re shutting down the servers at the end of August. Looks like we’re starting playoffs next week. Let’s look at the matchups. Eastern Conference New York Rangers(29-11-5) vs Tampa Bay Lightning(24-18-3) This is actually a very interesting matchup considering its a wildcard. To me, this is just @LaFleuR11 vs @Bo-Dangles10 . Two of the most dominant Dmen in the league facing off would make a very interesting game 7. What also makes this an interesting matchup is the fact that Tampa is quite a bit better than their 24-18-3 record as they started off 7-11 after two weeks before finding their groove. NYR on the other hand has been more or less consistently one of the best teams in the league all season. I could see this matchup going the distance but it's also very possible NYR’s 3rd steals a game from Tampa’s 2nd or even their 1st. NYR’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @SirGab- C: @x Chyzz Rw: @Mondy-_-91 Ld: @Bo-Dangles10 Rd: @MikeyD I7I TBL’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @OFs C: @GoalieGodz Rw: @I-MT98-I Ld: @Domix28- Rd: @LaFleuR11 NYR in 6 Toronto Maple Leafs(28-15-2) vs Washington Capitals(23-14-8) This matchup features Toronto’s virtually unstoppable west line vs Washington’s...elite 3rd line. Washington’s top 3 scorers are a combined 1.75mil. That is efficiency at its absolute finest. That being said, none of their 3 lines can compete vs Toronto’s west line not to mention Toronto’s 2nd featuring @Sitful , @rickchel , and @BKerslake8 (A WHOPPING 26.75MIL!). Toronto’s 3rd line is a joke and a guaranteed win for any of Washington’s lines. Toronto’s game 7 line is really difficult for me to do considering east vs west matchups and the overwhelming amount of skill shared between rick, Diamond, Sitful, and Tarasenko. TOR’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @rickchel C: @Sitful Rw: @xTarasenko91_ LD: @BKerslake8 RD: @Bazlund TOR’s Game 7 Line on West: Lw @Diamond l 4 l C: @Badbradguy5 Rw: @xTarasenko91_ @Ld: @BKerslake8 Rd: @Bazlund TOR in 5 New Jersey Devils(29-14-2) vs Pittsburgh Penguins(26-13-5) If you had told me before the season started that the Devils would be ahead of the Penguins I probably would have laughed at you but here we are. The Devils have home ice advantage so we probably won’t watch @BROSKI_002 get slapped in game 7 by @xNav61 1. This is an interesting matchup considering the Penguins’ struggles thus far. They have a throwaway 3rd line whereas New Jersey’s can at least compete. If it’s an East vs East matchup I give New Jersey a slight advantage but a lot can happen in a game. If it goes to a game 7 I can’t imagine @BROSKI_002 being dumb enough to throw his west line out vs @xNav61 … NJD’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @xLeGenDaRyy- C: @VEXEloQuence RwTmills71 @DodgesBlueShells Rd: @NH4JP PIT’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @Polgz- C: @KingClutch x 77 Rw: @Hriiz Ld: @NielerR Rd: @Gamingfreak911 NJD in 7 Montreal Canadiens(26-16-3) vs Buffalo Sabres(24-14-6) This matchup features a Canadiens’ first line that is 13-1-1 vs a Sabres’ first line that features 2 of the best players in the entire league: @JClaus33 and @P t P 10 . Considering my team is involved, I’m not going to say anything else. Considering Montreal has home ice advantage, we’ll be seeing Josh’s line in a game 7 matchup. MTL’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @Goostaav v C: @ImLxziee- Rw: @F0G19- Ld: @Heqld Rd: @PrometheusXVII BUF’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @Mjvoell44 4 C: @JClaus33 Rw: @jeff0012 Ld: @P t P 10 Rd: @Theos-_- Nope Western Conference Anaheim Ducks(31-11-4) vs St. Louis Blues(25-17-3) “Big Dick” Freeze has done it again. He’s built a cancerous team that turds so goddamn well that nobody could possibly hope to beat them. Combine that with the league’s best defensive core and you have a solid team. I wasn’t really sure how I felt about the Blues coming into this season and I’m still not. Outside of @Professor_Merana and arguably the league’s best goalie tandem, nobody on this team really has the ability to steal a game. Their third line has been atrocious considering the amount spent on it. It really pains me to say this, but this is the only completely lopsided matchup in this playoff scenario. ANA’s Game 7 Line: Literally just throw fucking any 3 forwards up there Ld: @cmike17 Rd: @Odieeeeee STL’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @Primetimme C: @White_Knucklerz Rw: @WaLe_Ovechkin Ld: @Professor_Merana Rd: @Nardo x 19 19 ANA in 4 Winnipeg Jets(28-11-7) vs Arizona Coyotes(25-16-5) If the best roster won the cup every year then we would have handed WPG the cup after the @eastons17 acquisition but this is an EASports game and you need more than just talent to win. Regardless, WPG boasts the league’s best roster without a doubt. I want to say WPG wins this without contest but Gour’s teams always struggle in the playoffs. Arizona’s saving grace is the struggling Winnipeg 3rd line so I can’t see Winnipeg winning this in 4. Final take: Considering Gour’s playoff track record…. Arizona in 6…...Kidding. WPG’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @eastons17 17 C: @ScaryJoeyy Rw: @DeathClxwn Ld: @Gwan Rd: @Gourr- ARI’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @Boughss C: @SJUSoccer9 Rw: @TGil36 Ld: @Jrascia Rd: @MrPurpleCrush WPG in 5 Nashville Predators(28-17-1) vs Chicago Blackhawks(27-17-1) I’ve been staring at my notes I’ve written down for both of these teams for about 15 minutes now and I can’t really think of anything to say. Chicago has a pretty decent west line and an okay top line but their defense is just absolute shit. Outside of @meka DVA meka and @canuckftc12W and I guess @ImSikBoi (Because west) their defense leaves much to be desired. With a Defense core like that it’s a miracle they’re in a playoff spot. On the other side, we see DoubleEGO and @RBCressor getting straight carried by their 2nd and 3rd lines. Nashville’s defense is a bit better but their best forward who they built their team around has been atrocious going 6-8. Right now, he shouldn’t be in the game 7 line but I think db egos himself in there… Also, my Chicago game 7 line is probably way off. NSH’s Game 7 Line: LW: @KesselySnipes420 CB Rw: @Parihse Ld: @RBCressor Rd: @x13arzy CHI’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @xVishh C: @Blurvous Rw: @Rivnasty Ld: @canuckftc12W Rd: @meka DVA meka Chicago in 7 Vancouver Canucks(30-11-3) vs Los Angeles kings(28-14-3) Vancouver is lowkey one of the most formidable teams in the league. Featuring an extremely successful west line, a 2nd line full of 6 guys who have played together for several years, and a 3rd line that.. although underperforming, is actually pretty good. I’ve been saying since the draft that Vancouver is a darkhorse candidate. That being said, their first test is a very difficult one. They have to play the Los Angeles Squeaker squad full of children who play every waking moment of the day. With the exception of LA’s weak 3rd line, this entire team is full of talent and many of them play together quite often. But can they play an entire playoff series without turning toxic and turning against each other? Probably not. Hot take: @Hra-ow drops a derogatory slur midgame then his mom comes in and screams at him forcing him to quit and then @ITIoMMy- quits. VAN has home ice advantage so NickyPing’s line will play. VAN’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @Daddys_Gooch_fur C: @nickyP1999 999 Rw: @Keeeks 12 Ld: @dparans ns Rd: @Notorious250 LAK’s Game 7 Line: Lw: @Hra-ow C: @ITIoMMy- Rw: @BLong67- Ld: @VegaRidge Rd: @x_ReAcTiiOnz_71 71 VAN in 6 I honestly really enjoyed doing this. Would you guys like to see more stuff like this? It’s a lot of work but enjoyable work. (Good and Bad Contracts List will be posted tommrow seprately)
Uhm I wasn’t ever slapping my dick in anyone’s face .... and freeze had a way better position to start off this season then I did .... so kind of comparing apples to oranges here .... that being said my team has been ass and lots of the reason has been ppl not showing up.... but for sure job well done by freeze this season ... legit proved the whole league wrong with the way he built his roster .... but this season has nothing to do with last , someone pls fwd this to brain dead Scy, thanks !
Our line has beaten winnipegs top line, one of anaheims top lines twice, pittsburgh's top line, as well as rivnasty's line on Chicago. Arguably the toughest level of competition anyone has faced all season when you examine all of our games. Additionally we have 7 shut out games. We don't need single people to steal games when we work as a unit.
