Garis93's Music Power Rankings: Providence Bruins Edition - Circle-jerk of Providence.. Since all of the AHL (and media) loves Providence and can't seem to stop talking about them. I wanted to contribute to this circle jerk so I've decided to my musical power rankings about each member of our team as tribute. I hope you enjoy the satire and don't take this seriously. Sand Bag Line: LW: @ZacKrell: Whip It - DEVO This is a joke about Zack not being able to play late games and getting his eight hours of sleep. No further comments. C: @ReidersWeiners2: Shining Star - Earth, Wind, and Fire Perhaps the next big thing in the AHL if he stays. Reiders oozes potential and it's a shame he isn't mentioned more. RW: @TIN045: Right Above It - Lil' Wayne Life's just a beach, and I'm just playing in the sand. (bag) LD: @Brisan66: U Can't Touch This - MC Hammer Brisan is invincible because we have Brodie and is the head of media or something. RD: @cabcavlax1: Unknown Legend - Neil Young Perhaps the least talked about player on our team, he replaced Cloud on the top pair. He's a diamond in the rough. "Second" Line LW: @LG McDonald: We Didn't Start The Fire - Billy Joel Brodie puts out fires in his spare time. I'm surprised he hasn't put us out yet since we're the best thing since sliced bread. C: @Smitterr: Simple Man - Lynyrd Skynyrd He seems to be the most reasonable of anyone on this line. Smitterr shows up to his games and makes his impact felt. He's a player's player. RW: @l Dangs l: Give It Away - Red Hot Chili Peppers He invites defenses to take the puck away from him. I could write an entire article on him. LD: @Neil x 25: Loser - Beck Neil knows we all love him. It's kind of a love we never show and are chirping him. The Real First Line LW: @Casey26lax FR: The Toilet Song - Bouncing Souls If Casey could play from the toilet, I'm sure he would. Spends more time on the toilet than warming up for LG. He's lucky I didn't use the Harry Potter theme for him. C: @I Horvat I: People Are Strange - The Doors Perhaps the strangest guy on our team, he has some real competition here. He fits in with our cult just fine and is a nice contrast to our styles. RW: @Garis93: Cutting My Fingers Off - Turnover I'm so aids that I play with no thumbs and people want to cut their fingers off when they play with me. I'm not sure how I'm having a good season. LD: @X OnCloudNine X: TV Party - Black Flag X TvTurnedOff x. Cloud and his TV jokes never get old. Also, DNA! RD: @HandsLikeHans: Too Shy - Kajagoogoo I rarely hear Hans talk more than a few words at a time. He fits in with our outcast line. Goalies: @Darcy Kuemper: Locked Up - Akon #FreeDarcy He needs his LG or he'll go into a drunken daze. @POTU5: Shout - Tears For Fears Please get a mic or I will buy you one. We haven't heard you talk all season. Let it all out. I hope you get all of our inside jokes now. This was meant out of fun and hopefully followed the ethical guidelines of the LGAHL media. Looking at a certain show. I don't know how many more PR's I'll do because of finding new songs every week. Support the news team, like, comment & share your thoughts on their work
@Garis93 I AM SOOOOO EXCITED RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I would play from the shitter, and have in the CHL!
