Trade Deadline - The Quarantine Zone - Season 29. I give credit to @deathstwr99 for his great suggestion to create a thread about teams you don't want to end up on after Trade Deadline. Unfortunately, you've earned yourself and the rest of Springfield a one way ticket to Shitsville. Thread Description: I will break down teams based off of Team Management, Season Trades, Player Statistics, and Level of Difficulty per division. For those teams that make the shit list, you will be placed in the quarantine zone. If you do find yourself unpacking your bags on one of these rosters, you’ve got 63 days to look forward to s30 AHL bidding. (Trade Deadline: April 1st, 5pm EST) Springfield Thunderbirds Management: @deathstwr99 – @Mats Zuccarelo (Ranger x 28) – @Cizikas x 52 These guys are outstanding players and standup guys. Probably some of my closest friends on LG, but unfortunately they made the shit list. I’m not sure how they screwed up (@Ballzy06) their roster and dropped down to the bottom of the standings in the Eastern Atlantic. Looking at Cizikas, I bet he wishes he was an only child, because it’s hard to live up to his big brother @Bossy_22_, who is an incredible NHL owner. Cizikas is coming in as an AGM for the 2nd time in his LG career. He is looking not to repeat the 35-40-7 record he had with the s26 Charlotte Checkers. Sure as shit, he’s doing worse. Deathstwr however was supposed to come in and carry this team, but it turns out he was carried by @Konecny x 11 & @GThumb42o in his 70 point season with the s28 Rochester Americans. By giving up one of the best goalies in the league, he robbed the Thunderbirds from any hope to make playoffs. What blows my mind is Mats Zuccarelo chose to pursue RW after having his best season ever in net with the s28 Chicago Wolves. The level of skill on this team is there, but they obviously can’t do anything with it. Their 9 forwards have a combined total of 226 points… MANITOBA’S TOP LINE HAS 200 ALONE. These guys are playing like they replaced their thumbs with their big toes. Their defense has allowed 174 goals against and convinced their management it was their goalies fault. They traded Ballzy06 and received @Endosmoke96, who isn’t even on their team anymore. That sure as shit solved the problem, eh boys? It means 1 of 3 things if you find yourself on Springfield’s roster come trade deadline: 1.) Your current management doesn’t care about you. 2.) Your lockers will always be stocked with lube. 3.) The rest of your season is over. At least Springfield can’t screw up anymore by trading away good players for shitters after the trade deadline… Syracuse Crunch Management: @SchwimpEggWoll (Mees Top cheese) - @Eagles9412 – (PAGM still Missing) Mees is one of my favorite guys I’ve had the pleasure to play NHL with and Eagles is an absolute beauty on the blue line, but that doesn’t save you from Shitsville. The Syracuse Crunch made the list due to the most recent trades they have made within the past 24 hours. Let’s take a moment of silence for our fallen brothers: @Cleppatron @Legion4 @N i n o 27x @SoaR Messiah @TheCoach96 @UnshippedOwlcat @Washboard25 @GuiDoval17 Knowing they are not going to make playoffs, they decided to be “nice” and have a fire sale. Literally since 11:27pm of last night, Syracuse only has 6 of their week 6 roster players left on their team. Some of these trades have been absolute trash including the Stockton trape, and the literal trash players (@Neil x 25) involved in the 10 trades they’ve completed. It’s safe to say Syracuse is turning into a buffet garbage chute. It looks as if @SchwimpEggWoll @GreenMonster311 @IIx OMARK xII & @TheCoach96 are the best forwards on Syracuse, while Coach is their leading point producer with a whopping 36 points. After making as many trades as they did, the only way Syracuse can do any good is by getting @Big Blaster 14 the hell out of there. If you end up on Syracuse come trade deadline expect a juicy fat 500k contract next season. Texas Stars Management: @xxCARUCHxx - @l Bolts x 91 l – Waxibono Texas has the 2nd most goals against in the entire league. They are tied for 5th least amount of goals scored in the entire league. Half of their players have either been called up from the CHL or have been inactive for half of the season. 9 of their players have a losing record. They have 3 weeks to accumulate 19 more points than the 4th seed in their division to make playoffs. Bolts & Caruch are suuuuuper nice guys, like super nice. BUT MY GOD, Caruch put your dog on a god damn leash. I’ve heard from so many people that Bolts cannot stop messaging every single team 3 times a day looking for trades. What’s insane is that Caruch has no idea Bolts is doing it. Like bro, you have a 17 man roster. You are last in your division not because your 17 players are bad. You are last in your division, because you’ve cycled through over 100 players in 6 weeks. If you haven’t already been traded to Texas you most likely will within the next few hours. But don’t worry, you’ll most likely get traded somewhere else before you can even click on the notification informing you that you’ve been traded to Texas. Once the trade window is closed Texas won’t be able to toss their players around the league anymore, but that won't stop their urges... We all can unclench our cheeks knowing we are not in Texas. Belleville Senators Hellen Keller is better than your entire roster. IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT Out of the integrity of the league, please don’t quit. Show up for your games, have fun with your new teammates and KICK SOME ASS! Support the news team, like, comment & share your thoughts on their work
I have called the local authorities and they have readied the burn unit for a mass migration to their doors. Well done Darcy.
Giveaways like those done by a few teams are more harmful to the integrity of the league than 100 players quitting. “Being nice” isn’t your fucking job as a manager. Your job is to do your best to field a competitive team until there are no more games left to play. Managers who give away their best players to playoff teams should have their names added in bold to the NML.
If you could give out more multiple season contracts I would agree with you. But since most teams turnover the majority of their players (and often times management) season to season, blowing it up doesn’t negatively effect the team next year. Especially if you can try to get draft picks or TC players in return. It’s not really any different than the real trade deadline where there are obviously buyers and sellers. As long as the teams having fire sales can still get 6 people to show up for the rest o their games instead of having a bunch of FF’s the last couple weeks, I really don’t see how it hurts the integrity of the league.
When teams effectively become farm clubs for their buddies and hand over talent at a discount, it undermines competition. I’m not taking about trades that bring in fair value for next season, or shaking up a team. It’s the “we’re out of the race so I’ll hand over my good players to my buddy running another team” nonsense.
Can say @deathstwr99 @Mats ZuccareIIo @Cizikas x 53 are standup guys. Def miss them birds! If you goin to a bottom team this season. Them the guys you wanna play for
